Envy Makes Us Miserable

Image by Amy Wardlaw

Ever wished you had something someone else had?

I know I have.

But there’s a fine line between looking at my friend’s car and planning to get one like it and feeling angry that he has it and I can’t afford it.

In the United States, where most residents earn enough to cover life’s necessities, major purchases are often meant to convey status rather than add comfort.

It’s not that we’re trying to make the less fortunate hate us. It’s more like rewarding ourselves with a slice of pie after torching 1,500 calories.

When the roles are reversed, though, lacking what others have that we want can produce a sense of inadequacy, sadness, anger, and hatred — or more precisely, envy.

These feelings are compounded when that person didn’t have to work as hard as we would to obtain that possession — if they had to work for it at all.

The fact another person is enjoying a pleasure that someone else — be it, family or friends — gave them can enrage us. Few things highlight the unfairness of life quite like this.

But although such inequity can infuriate us, we ought to pause to ask ourselves how exactly these feelings help us?

We can’t control where we were born or what we were born with. But we can control what we do…